DARK SHADOWS

In films like Edward Scissorhands and Batman Tim Burton showed a marvelously quirky style that set him apart from Hollywood norms. Even his lesser films like Mars Attacks bare his indelible mark. But in the 00's, it became clear that there was another Burton, a more commercial Burton, who made films like Planet of the Apes (2001), Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and the practically unwatchable, yet somehow immensely profitable Alice In Wonderland. That is not to say that the last decade has been a wash for Burton. Corpse Bride is well liked, Big Fish is among his best and Sweeney Todd might be his best. That said it cannot be denied that Burton's output has been uneven of late, and it is his more "commercial" projects that are the culprits.

All that said. I am convinced that Burton the auteur made Dark Shadows, the new adaptation of the cult soap opera of the same name. However, he has neglected to make a good film. The film starts off strongly. Back in 1760 the Collins family moves from Liverpool to "the wilds of Maine" and make their fortune in fishing. The young Barnabas Collins (Johnny Depp) falls for Josette (Bella Heathcote), but in doing so he spurns the affections of a sexy housemaid Angelique (Eva Green), who is also a witch (TWIST!). Angelique uses black magic to kill Josette and turn Barnabas into a vampire and imprison him in a coffin.

Flash forward to 1972. We meet Victoria Winters (also played by Heathcote), who is joining the staff of the now run-down Collinwood Manor. Specifically, she is to care for the youngest Collins (Gulliver McGrath) who sees the ghost of his mother. The Ghost looks an awful lot like Josette, but then again, so does Victoria. This could have been the start of a nice, moody, Shining-esque adventure. (Victoria's Approach to Collinwood by train even mirrors the Torrence families arrival by car in The Shining). I would like to have seen that movie. But then Barnabas escapes from that coffin.

Barnabas has now been out of the world for 200 years. Like Rip Van Winkle, he learns that the world has changed quite a bit. A lot of jokes are mined from this. A. Lot. Of. Jokes. Some are good, like a visual gag involving a McDonald's sign. Then there is a groan inducing quotation from Love Story. It is interesting that the new age Barnabas finds himself in is now forty years old. This was probably done so that Burton could include the lava lamp and hippie jokes that where the bread and butter of the T.V. show (I've just been informed that they where not). There is also a great deal of business with Agellique (now the head of a rival fishery) who's trying to win Barnabas's affections away from Victoria. This leads to the worst scene in the film where the two fight/make love while Barry White plays in the background. It is a bad scene in conception and execution, it is a prime example of a jump-the-shark moment in a film and of a director off his game.

As for Johnny Depp... I'm beginning to wonder if Depp is still able to give a good performance without crazy make-up and a wig. This is his eighth collaboration with Burton, and the paring doesn't excite the way it used to. They don't seem to disturb each others molecules anymore. Still, Depp is good enough, his deadpan ignorance gets more laughs than the material deserves but still gets old fast. Burton seems to sense that the material is running thin and starts up the love story again. But by that point, Victoria's story has been so neglected that I had forgotten the character was in the film at all. It is a bad sign when an audience forgets the existence of one of the legs in a love triangle. By the time of the climactic house fire, I had long since checked out.

Even worse are the frightfully dull Collins family. Michelle Pfeiffer (Batman Returns) plays Elizabeth Collins who has no real traits whatsoever. Johnny Lee Miller (Trainspotting), plays a thieving father (a little better), and Chloe¨ Grace Moretz (Hugo, Kick-Ass) plays Carolyn, a teenager who's acting out (imagine that!). Helena Botham Carter's character has the most to do. She's a shrink who thinks she can cure Barnabas of vamperism with blood transfusions. It comes to nothing and the whole subplot seems to be there to mark time and nothing more.

It's still a very Burton film, the art direction isn't as loopy as before, but is still recognizably his. The foggy cinematography by Bruno Delbonnel (Amélie) is frequently striking and moody. No one but Burton could have made the film, I just wish that he had made something else.

Grade: C